The Secret to A Long life: Poetry, Friends and Family

Dorothy Stafford is no longer ‘the wife of a famous poet, William Stafford,’ but her own person

By Cori Bolger

The Lake Oswego Review, Jan 10, 2008, Updated Oct 30, 2009 (1 Reader comment)

Dorothy Stafford, wife of famed poet William Stafford and Lake Oswego teacher, keeps her social calendar full by visiting with friends and attending readings, lectures and plays. This month, she will read at several events held by the Friends of William Stafford to celebrate her late husband’s birthday.

Vern Uyetake / Lake Oswego Review

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In scenery I like flat country.

In life I don’t like much to happen.

In personalities I like mild colorless people.

And in colors I prefer gray and brown.

My wife, a vivid girl from the mountains, says, “Then why did you choose me?”

Mildly I lower my brown eyes — there are so many things admirable people do not understand.

— “Passing Remark” by William Stafford

Although she was William Stafford’s cherished companion, Dorothy Stafford was never the poet’s muse.

During solitary writing sessions, her “Bill” found inspiration for his gentle quotidian-style poems in man’s relationship with nature and the minutia of life.

Dorothy, on the other hand, was something else entirely – his confidant, his equal, and, as he once described her, “a vivid girl from the mountains.”

And that internal brightness has not lessened, even in times of great grief and sorrow.

Friends and poetry fans around Lake Oswego adore Dorothy’s sharp wit, warm demeanor and compassionate nature. They also ask her to reveal the secret to her long, fulfilling life.

Of course, she gives them partial credit.

“She is a remarkable person, a luminous creature,” said Paulann Petersen, a close family friend. “She is alert to what is good and wonderful in the world.”

Dorothy turned 92 on Monday and was feted by Petersen and other close friends and relatives at her annual birthday celebration. About 40 friends from across Oregon attended, including Bill Baars, director of the Lake Oswego Public Library.

“As far as I’m concerned, Dorothy is the soul of the community,” Baars said. “She not only keeps alive what (Bill) meant to the community, she adds a whole other element with her contributions.”

Even the city has recognized those contributions, which range from involvement in civic organizations to volunteering at the library and teaching in two public schools.

Lake Oswego’s street crews landscaped a small plot at the intersection of Sunningdale Road and 10th Street and named it “Dorothy’s Corner” at a dedication last April. The personalized plaque surprised Dorothy, who helped plan the public space.

“When I heard rumors about this park, I thought ‘Why? There was no need for that,” Dorothy said. “Then I realized all of my life I’ve asked ‘Why?’ so now I’ll ask ‘Why not?’”

Dorothy crosses it every day during her stroll around the neighborhood and says it keeps walkers from getting splashed by cars passing over puddles. Flowers, grass and shrubs bloom there year-round, much like Dorothy herself.

“I never thought I could be so old and have such a rich life,” Dorothy said.

Although she had never lived alone before, Bill’s sudden death in 1993 couldn’t keep Dorothy from carving out a life on her own.

“My mother struggled, then was successfully her own person,” said son Kim Stafford. “She became, as one friend said, ‘No longer ‘the wife of a famous poet, William Stafford,’ but simply ‘Dorothy Stafford.’”

A major player in the local literary scene, she regularly attends author lectures, readings and her monthly book club meeting, where she drinks a glass of wine and discusses local and world events.

Plays and concerts keep her busy, as do visitors who pop in at her modest Lake Oswego home, where the Stafford family has lived for 50 years.

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